Monday, June 30, 2014

Dialogue that Propels the Story Forward

"Blah, blah, blah," she said.

"Yup."

"Did you hear what I just said?"

"Didn't understand it, more life it."

"Why you...!"

Have you ever experience or witnessed a conversation like that? Read one in your recent books? Did it make you want to throw the book against the wall and yell, "just get to the point!"

Been there.

Dialogue should be about something. It should move the plot forward in some way or it's useless. Pretty much like the beginning of this blog post, eh?

As a writing coach, it's difficult not to tell my clients that their dialogue just doesn't work, and then try to get them to understand that it must connect with the theme and plot, include tensions and suspense, all while moving the story forward.

So, they usually throw up their hands in despair and ask, "Why write at all?"

I have a trick or two to help you. Actually my trick is Gloria Kempton and her book Dialogue: Techniques and exercises for crafting effective dialogue. The tricks are hers and now yours.

Your Dialogue Must Move The Story Forward
Move the plot forward. Sounds easy, right?
Dialogue is a means to an end, not the end itself. Don't get all caught up in your characters having a great conversation that you forgot what your story was all about and why these two characters were in it.

Simple tip: You engage your characters in conflict and use dialogue to increase their struggle.

According to Ms. Kempton:

Dialogue is one of the fiction elements you can use to propel your plot forward and integrate your theme into each scene. They way you do this is to set your characters up in an animated discussion scene that does any one of a number of things: 


  • provides new information to the characters about the conflict, 
  • reveals new obstacles that the viewpoint character must overcome to achieve his goal, 
  • creates the kind of dynamic between the scene characters that furthers the story's theme, 
  • introduces a pivotal moment in the plot that transforms the character(s), 
  • set up the discussion so the character (and reader) are reminded of his scene and story goals, 
  • and/or accelerates the emotion and story movement to increase the suspense and make the situation more urgent for the characters.


If you remember the seven purpose of dialogues, you can get through this.

Provides New Information
Have your characters talking and then have one of them add a new bit of information that takes the conversation and plot into an entirely new direction. Throw obstacles at your readers.

Reveals New Obstacles
When considering dialogue, an obstacle to a character's goal works the same and throwing in a new topic or conversation direction that creates immediate conflict. The character can express his discomfort verbally, but he's going to have to physically do something to move the story forward.

Increases Suspense
Suspense increases when you keep making it look worse for your characters. You can do this very well with dialogue because the character is already "in the moment" and the reader is "watching" how the character is going to handle the suspense that's been dropped on him.

According to Ms. Kempton: Suspense is achieved in dialogue when the viewpoint character gets "that feeling" about the other character in the scene. Or suddenly realizes that things are not as they seem.

Furthers The Theme
Gloria Kempton loves when an author lets a character reveal the story's theme in dialogue. In her book, "Dialogue" she tells about getting a "kick" out of observing how other writers do it, whether novelists or screenwriters.

She says: When a character announces the story's theme in the middle of a passage of dialogue, it gives the other characters the opportunity to respond and move the action in one direction or another. This can be very effective, because while the reader my not necessarily be able to recognize the theme as the a-ha moment in the story, subconsciously it registers as a pivotal moment and the reader holds her breath, waiting to see how the other characters will respond.

Shows Character Transformation
As writers, we should be changing our characters, in subtle ways, throughout our story. This is why we write fiction. We want to show how our character can change. For the better or worse. In order for a transformation to happen, and our characters changed forever, a profound moment has to happen. In dialogue, it happens with words.

Reveals/Reminds of Goals
Obstacles. That's an important elements when helping characters change and move the story along. Throwing obstacles at your character reminds him/her about their goal, their intention in the scene, and in the story.  To do this the best way possible, you use your protagonist to show these change with action and dialogue.

Gloria says: In every scene, you want to remind your reader of the main character's intention, as this is the way you engage your reader and keep engaging her as the story progresses. Using dialogue for  this purpose is especially effective because the character is stating his goal out loud.

Would you rather your character say around and thought about his passion or reminisced about his intention? Showing with dialogue is so much better. And it moves the scene along.

Keeping Your Characters In Social Settings
I know it sounds simple, but dialogue can't happen if there isn't more than one character. If you have your character talk to themselves too long, the story goes south and the reader becomes bored. So, how do we keep the story moving? Add more than one character to the scene.

Readers really enjoy when characters are engaged in dialogue and action.

Simple Tip: A scene of dialogue must always move the story forward in some way.

There is a strategy for bringing all three elements of the scene together: dialogue, narrative, and action. It's so the scene is balanced and focused on its purpose.

Was this helpful?



Resource: Dialogue: Techniques an Exercises for Crafting Effective Dialogue by Gloria Kempton
Copyright: coramax / 123RF Stock Photo

Friday, June 27, 2014

Friday Five Minute Exercise - Your Right to Experience Growth

1. Set your clocks/timers for Five (5) Minutes.

2. Write about Your Right to Experience Growth. We often shun others because they are different. We should embrace diversity and open-mindedness. I believe when other do not let you grow, they are doing so because they simply fear what is different. They do not feel validated. Do you write in order to experience growth?

Get into as much detail as you can for the next five minutes.

3. Ready?

4. Go.

5. Finished? Review and be amazed.

I hope you had fun. Come back next Friday for a new writing prompt.

Was this exercise helpful?


Did you succeed with this writing exercise?  We all are different, in our special way. Do you embrace diversity? Are you open-minded? Do you write in order to experience growth? Why or Why not? Was this exercise helpful? Did you enjoy it?


Why or Why Not?


Monday, June 23, 2014

Character Sketch - Of Yourself!

We all can mostly figure out out to create a character for our stories. We come up a physical description, add in some character traits and then give him/her a personality. Viola! You have a brand new character to give you all kinds of grief in your next book.

However, did you ever wonder what it would be like to do a character sketch of yourself? I thought this exercise might give you more insight in helping you further develop your story characters.

Let's give this a try, shall we?

A character sketch is a written description of another person, in this case you. It's going to help you really get to know yourself and in turn, help you learn how to really develop story characters.

If you think it might help, try writing your character sketch from another's point of view. It can be extremely revealing to see yourself through the eyes of another.

Barbara Sher's Wishcraft: How to Get What You Really Want, suggests investigating your home as if you were a private detective trying to figure out the sort of person living there.

Think about it: You're going to be going through clothes closets, kitchen cabinets, bookshelves, entertainment videos and such. You'll review the furniture, rugs, curtains, pictures, food in the refrigerator, and right down to the colors on the wall. Don't forget to notice clutter if it's there or if the "person" you are investigating is a "neat freak."

Ask yourself these questions: Would you say that the person who lived there is organized or scatterbrained? Sociable or solitary? Sensual or intellectual?

Now, write a sketch of the person living in your house, or write the sketch from a different point of view. But, get the point across about the type of person living there and personality.

You might be surprised about how well you knew or didn't know about yourself. You might find that missing object you've been looking for all these months. And, you might find the perfect character for your next novel.

You can do this exercise with others as well. Sit with a group of writers, with whom you've worked well, and write sketches of each other. It would be interesting to see how others see you, wouldn't it?

Enjoy!




Copyright: sergwsq / 123RF Stock Photo

Friday, June 20, 2014

Friday Five Minute Exercise - Intellectual Contributions

1. Set your clocks/timers for Five (5) Minutes.

2. Write about Intellectual Contributions. Knowing that we will pass away eventually leaves many people with the need to contribute in a physical way. Do you offer your words to the world as a way to cement your time on this earth?

Get into as much detail as you can for the next five minutes.

3. Ready?

4. Go.

5. Finished? Review and be amazed.

I hope you had fun. Come back next Friday for a new writing prompt.

Was this exercise helpful?


Did you succeed with this writing exercise?  We all understand that we are passing on from this world eventually, correct? What meaning do you give the words you right? Are they a way to cement your time on this earth? Why or Why not? Was this exercise helpful? Did you enjoy it?


Why or Why Not?



Monday, June 16, 2014

The Least You Should Know - Quotation Marks

Quotation Marks are a fickle creature when it comes to punctuation. Where do you put them, when do you put them, how do you put them?

All great questions. Usually quotation marks go around speech. Dialogue. Talking.  Like this little guy here to the left. He's speaking but we don't know what he's saying so we need to give him quotation marks to indicate what is speech.

Got it?

But, did know that you put quotation marks around other things you write besides dialogue? 

Yep, and we're going to learn how to use quotation marks properly in this post.

So, let's begin.


1. Put Quotation Marks around the exact words of a speaker (but not around an indirect quotation)

She said, "I will not go." (Her exact words.)

She said that she would not go. (Not her exact words.)

Whenever that precedes the words of a speaker (as in the last example), it indicates that the words are not a direct quotation and should not have quotation marks around them.

She said, "I will not go. I have other plans. Don't bother picking me up."

The words telling who is speaking are set off with a comma, unless of course, a question mark or exclamation mark is needed.

"I will not go," she said.

He said, "You will go."

"Don't you understand me?" she asked.

"Come here!" he shouted.

Every quotation begins with a capital letter. But when a quotation is broken, the second part doesn't begin with a capital letter unless it's a new sentence.

"Genius," said Anthony, "is the art of taking infinite pains."

"Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated," said David Lloyd George. "You can't cross a chasm in tow small jumps."

Always begin a new paragraph with each change of speaker.

"May I have that brush?" I asked.
"What for?" Nancy said.
"To brush my dog's hair," I replied.


2. Put Quotation Marks around the name of a story, poem, essay, or other short work. For longer words such as books, newspapers, plays, or movies, use underlining (which means italics in print) or use italics.

I like Robert Frost's short poem "Fire and Ice."

Have you seen the movie Star Wars?

Rachel Carson's essay "And No Birds Sing" is found in her book Silent Spring.

We went to see the play The Lion King.



There you have it. Quotation Marks aren't as difficult as we once thought, once we know the rules, right?

Did you get all your questions answered? Do you have more questions about Quotation Marks? Ask in the comments below.



Friday, June 13, 2014

Friday Five Minute Exercise - Your Life Purpose

1. Set your clocks/timers for Five (5) Minutes.

2. Write about Your Life Purpose. Do you think the gift of being a writer is related to your life purpose? Write a one-page declaration of your life purpose and then put it close to you when you write. The written declaration will help guide your soul as you write.

Get into as much detail as you can for the next five minutes.

3. Ready?

4. Go.

5. Finished? Review and be amazed.

I hope you had fun. Come back next Friday for a new writing prompt.

Was this exercise helpful?


Did you succeed with this writing exercise?  Is your life purpose all about writing? Were you able to create a one-page declaration about your life purpose? Do you have it near when you write? Does it help? Was this exercise helpful? Did you enjoy it?


Why or Why Not?


Monday, June 9, 2014

Creating a Child Character and Generating a Starting Phrase

When writing a novel, you include many different characters. You probably have a routine you use to what's come up with the various character traits for each character.

You may not be used to creating a child character. I have a few tips on putting together a profile for a child character to include in your story. 

The resource I used is Take Ten for Writers by Bobbie Neubauer. It's a writing exercise that will take approximately ten minutes to complete. 

1.  Give yourself a name with the initials G.L.S.

2. Give yourself an age between three and nine. 


Now, answer the following questions:

1. Are you male or female?
2. What's your ethnic background?
3. Are you short or tall for your age?
4. Is your build skinny, average, chunky or something else?
5. Where's your favorite place to play?
6. What's your favorite toy/game?
7. What's something you've hidden?
8. What's your brief opinion about adults?
9. What does your bedroom look like?
10. How do (or don't) your parents punish you?

You are now this child. Pull on his/her personality. You don't have to incorporate the information you generated above into your story if you don't want to; simply use it as background information to help you get into character. Write from the point of view of this child, trying to soynd like you really are his/her age. 

Now pick a number between 1 and 10. 

Find the chosen number below. This becomes the starting phrase of writing your story. 

1. My head stuck up above the bubbles in the tub like ...
2. We splashed all afternoon in the baby poll ...
3. The sandbox was overflowing with ...
4. The sun was just setting when I got lost at the carnival ...
5. The cotton candy melted on my tongue like ...
6. Even though my dad yelled at me not to do it again, I couldn't help jumping ...
7. I kept jiggling and wiggling my front tooth ...
8. At the petting zoo, the goat ...
9. The first time I slept over my best friend's house ...
10. I hate getting dressed up, but my mother insisted I ...

Now take ten minutes and write. 


Kids are naturally creative. To reacquaint yourself with this part of your being, engage in kid's activities: climb a tree; buy finger paints and make a messy masterpiece; get crayons and a coloring book and scribble outside the lines; chase lightening bugs in the summer; have a snowball fight in the winter. When you're done playing, but still have the youthful lightness in your heart, grab a pen and paper (or paints, crayons, or markers) and write starting with the words: I played...

Enjoy!



Photo Reference: ME! The child in the picture is my oldest granddaughter. Isn't she cute?


Friday, June 6, 2014

Friday Five Minute Exercise - Pleasure and Pain

1. Set your clocks/timers for Five (5) Minutes.

2. Write about Pleasure and Pain. Are you ever inspired to write by the occurrences of pleasure and/or pain in your life? Does writing about these topics allow you to understand yourself better? Painful memories often stay buried until the writing process digs them up for you to sift and sort through.

Get into as much detail as you can for the next five minutes.

3. Ready?

4. Go.

5. Finished? Review and be amazed.

I hope you had fun. Come back next Friday for a new writing prompt.

Was this exercise helpful?


Did you succeed with this writing exercise? Was it helpful? What was it like to write about pleasure and pain? Was one more difficult than the other? Were you able to discover painful memories of your life and write about them? Were you able to feel better after writing about painful topics? Was this exercise helpful? Did you enjoy it?


Why or Why Not?



Monday, June 2, 2014

The Least You Should Know - Commas

salt shaker image
Commas are like salt, either you use too much or not enough. In any editor's opinion, commas are used too much. And, like most seasonings, if you use too much, you lose the ultimate flavor of the dish and end up with bitter food.

So, to help you keep the seasonings light in your writing, we're going to discuss the proper use of the comma.

Number one rule: Don't use a comma unless you know a rule for it.

Commas are important for your reader. Without commas, you reader would often have to go back and reread a sentence to find out exactly what you meant to write.

Don't keep the reader guessing or having to interpret your writing. Your book may end up thrown against the furthest wall.

For you, my dear writer, I'll give you the six comma rules. Master these rules and your writing will be easier to read. And, that makes a happy reader. Ultimate goal, right?

1. Put a comma before and, but, for, or, nor, yet, so when they connect two independent clauses.

We lost the stick, and that was the end of the game of fetch.

We may have a donut, or we may have an apple.

Be sure the above mentioned words do connect two independent clauses. The following sentence is merely one independent clause with one subject and two verbs. Therefore no comma should be used.

I wanted to go to the beach but couldn't find my swimsuit.


2. Put a comma between items in a series.

Hurrah for the red, white, and blue.

He picked up the mail, walked into the house, and answered the telephone.

Some words "go together" and don't need a comma between them even though they do make up a series.

The eager little boy.

The wrinkled old hands.

Here is a way to tell whether a commas is needed between two words in a series: see whether and could be used naturally between them.

It would sound okay to say red and white and blue; therefore commas are used. But, it would not sound right to say eager and little boy or wrinkled and old hands; therefore no commas are used. Simple enough? Just use a comma where an and could be used. Of course, it is all right to omit the comma before the and connecting the last two members of a series, but more often it is used.

If an address or date is used in a sentence, treat it as a series, putting a comma after every item, including the last.

She was born on June 29, 1972, in Lansing, Michigan, and grew up there.

She lived in Buffalo, New York, for three years.

When only the month and year are used in a date, the commas may be omitted.

In July 1998 she moved to New Jersey.

3. Put a comma after an introductory expression or afterthought that doesn't flow smoothly into the sentence. It may be a word, a group of words, or a dependent clause.

No, I will not go.

Well, that was the end of that.

Moreover, the editor agreed with me.

It's warm this afternoon, isn't it?

Running on the ice, he slipped and fell.

When everyone had left, the restaurant was locked for the night.

You already know that dependent clauses at the beginning of a sentence needs a comma after it. In the last example you can see that a comma is necessary. Otherwise the reader would read When everyone had left the restaurant ... before realizing that that was not what the writer meant. A comma prevents misreading.


4. Put commas around the name of a person spoken to.

I think, Vicki, that you are absolutely right.

Karen, how about a game of cards?

I've finished washing the dishes, Frank.


5. Put commas around an expression that interrupts the flow of the sentence. (such as however, moreover, finally, therefore, of course, by the way, on the other hand, I am sure, I think).

I hope, of course, that everyone is all right.

We took our plates, therefore, and got in the buffet line.

It should, I think, take only an hour to fix the car.

Read the preceding sentences aloud, and you will hear how those expressions interrupt the flow of the sentence. Sometimes, however, such expressions flow smoothly into the sentence and don't need commas around them. Whether a word is an interrupter or not often depends on where it is in the sentence. If it is in the middle of the sentence, it is more likely to be an interrupter than if it is at the beginning or the end. The expressions that were interrupters in the preceding sentences are not interrupters in the following sentences and therefore don't need commas.

Of course I hope that everyone is all right.

Therefore we took our plates and got in the buffet line.

I think it should only take an hour to fix the car.

So, a word like however or therefore may be used in three ways:

a. as an interrupter (commas around it)
b. as a word that flows into the sentence (no commas needed)
c. as a connecting word between two independent clauses (semicolon before it and a comma after it)


6. Put commas around nonessential material.

Some written material may be interesting, but the main idea of the sentence would be clear without it. In the following sentence

Albert Connor, who is running for president, will speak tomorrow.

the clause who is running for president is not essential to the main idea of the sentence. Without it we still know exactly who the sentence is about and what he is going to do: Albert Connor will speak tomorrow. Therefore the nonessential material is set off from the rest of the sentence by commas to show that it could be left out. But in the following sentence

The man who is running for president will speak tomorrow.

the clause who is running for president is essential to the main idea of the sentence. Without it the sentence would read: The man will speak tomorrow. We would have no idea which man. The clause who is running for president is essential because it tells us which man. It couldn't be left out. Therefore commas are not used around it. In this sentence

The Client, a novel by John Grisham, was a best-seller.

the words a novel by John Grisham could be left out, and we would still know the main meaning of the sentence: The Client was a best-seller. Therefore the nonessential material is set off by commas to show that it could be left out. But in this sentence

John Grisham's novel The Client was a best-seller.

the title of the novel is essential. Without it the sentence would read: John Grisham's novel was a best-seller. We would have no idea which of John Grisham's novels was a best-seller. Therefore the title couldn't be left out, and commas are not used around it.


In review:

1. Put a comma before and, but, for, or, nor, yet, so when they connect two independent clauses.
2. Put a comma between items in a series.
3. Put a comma after an introductory expression or afterthought that doesn't flow smoothly into the sentence.
4. Put commas around the name of a person spoken to.
5. Put commas around an interrupter, like however, moreover, etc.
6. Put commas around nonessential material.

Simple, right? I knew you'd get it. Now, go season that bit of writing you've been working on and apply these rules.